Why Adults Bully?
Bullying is a pervasive problem that affects individuals of all ages, races, and genders. While bullying is often associated with children and teenagers, the sad truth is that adults can also engage in bullying behaviour. In this blog post, we will explore the reasons why adults bully.
Insecurity and Low Self-Esteem
One of the primary reasons why adults bully is due to feelings of insecurity and low self-esteem. Bullies often feel inadequate and powerless in their own lives, and they try to compensate by asserting dominance over others. This behaviour can be especially prevalent in work environments, where individuals may feel threatened by their colleagues' success and seek to undermine them
2. Past Trauma
Another common reason why adults bully is due to past trauma. Individuals who have experienced abuse, neglect, or other forms of trauma may internalize their pain and use bullying as a means of projecting their hurt onto others. They may also see bullying as a way to gain control and avoid being victimized again.
3. Personality Disorders
There is evidence to suggest that individuals with certain personality disorders are more likely to engage in bullying behaviour. Specifically, those with a narcissistic or antisocial personality disorder may be more prone to such behaviour due to their tendency to lack empathy for others and view them as instruments for their own purposes. Additionally, these individuals may exhibit a sense of entitlement that leads them to believe they are above rules and societal norms, including the prohibition against bullying. Studies have supported the association between these personality disorders and bullying behaviour, indicating a need for targeted interventions for individuals with these disorders who exhibit bullying behaviour.
4. Power and Control
Finally, some adults bully simply because they enjoy having power and control over others. They may get a sense of satisfaction from seeing others cower or submit to their demands. This can be especially prevalent in abusive relationships, where the bully may use physical, emotional, or financial abuse to control their partner.
What to do?
If you witness bullying in the workplace or online as an adult, there are several steps you can take to address the situation:
Speak up: If you feel safe to do so, speak up and address the bullying behaviour directly with the individual(s) involved. Explain how their behaviour is unacceptable and the impact it has on others.
Report the behaviour: If you don't feel comfortable confronting the bully, or if the behaviour continues, report it to a supervisor, HR representative, or another authority figure. Be specific about the behaviour you witnessed and provide any evidence if possible.
Document the incidents: Keep a record of any incidents of bullying that you witness, including the date, time, location, and what happened. This documentation can be helpful if you need to report the behaviour or take legal action.
Seek support: Bullying can be stressful and emotionally taxing, so seek support from friends, family, or a mental health professional if you need it.
Advocate for change: If you are in a position to do so, advocate for policies and procedures to prevent bullying in the workplace or online. Encourage your workplace or online community to implement anti-bullying measures, such as training and education on appropriate behaviour and consequences for violating policies.
There are many reasons why adults may engage in bullying behaviour. Bullying is a harmful and destructive behaviour that should be addressed and stopped whenever possible, whether it is due to insecurity, past trauma, cultural norms, personality disorders, or a desire for power and control. If you or someone you know is being bullied, it is crucial to seek help and support from a trusted friend, family member, or professional. And if you come across someone bullying another in the workplace or online, report it, don’t be a bystander. Together, we can work to create a more compassionate and inclusive world where bullying is not tolerated.
If you or someone you know would like to access support regarding current or past bullying behaviour contact Wellbeing Campus, we have experienced clinicians who can help you in this space. We will also soon be launching a stalking and bullying support group whereby you can find peer support, you’re not alone.